If I bash them, it's only with my tongue in my cheek.
I'm sitting at my desk in the city where I live.
Reading the daily newspaper, enjoying a cup of coffee.
My thoughts drift away.
What if my desktop was 20 acres in the city?
I'd hear people tell me I should develop my property.
Population is on the rise. The world is becoming more complicated.
Why not build a Mall on that property?
The more I think about, the more I like the idea.
Greeting Cards & Gift Shops.
Stores, stores, & more stores.
Seems a lot better than dirt, grass & rocks.
Everybody else is doing it. Thats how the city got built.
OK, I'm interested.
Next logical stop, the offices of the Mall Development Company.
They tell me the have a Plan for me.
Show me a powerful, point filled presentation.
This is the Future.
Hard ceilings, hard floors & even versatile floppy things.
A wonderful collection of walls, doors & of course Windows to display everything.
What more could I want?
Plan has it I can customize the decor to suit me & the other businesses, too.
Escalators, automatic this n' that. Shortcuts. Organization.
I am assured that they really understand the community I live in.
The ways of the new world around me. Facts & demographics. Politics.
Man, I'm impressed. Where do I sign?
Contractors build it.
They all have the Plan in front of them when they design those walls & windows.
I can hardly wait.
Excited, I make plans for all the individual stores.
For months I work with all those people, thinking of the people who will use My Mall.
Proudly, I open the doors in a big grand opening celebration.
I wander through the amazing place with my silver circle in my breast pocket.
Knowing I can slip that disk in and it all fits together like a big, happy family.
The owner, I bought and paid for it, can stroll confidently and mingle with the other people.
Pleased that beautiful music fills the air, and each way I turn offers wide variety of selections.
Not long after that I'm sitting in the dynamic Library, studying books.
Things are not exactly what I expected. I need some answers.
Next to the pile of books is a 27 page document I've just received from the Mall Development Co.
I guess it means it's all true.
Escalators inexplicably stop and reverse momentarily.
The background music is periodically interupted by distressing announcements.
Doors are automatically locking, never on Sunday though.
The theatre is experiencing difficulties showing movies.
My silver circle sometimes is rejected when I try to use it.
A large multi-national Peacekeeping force patrols constantly.
Parts of the parking lot have been done over to accomodate a perimeter wall.
Guard shacks and gates at every entrance.
The brick masons are upset that the wall they built doesn't conform to Plan.
It used to, they say.
A former Giant company representative waits for an appointment.
Several display windows have suddenly become a fraction of the normal size.
I need a roofing company to patch the roof over port 1439.
The messenger service has been stopped.
The bank insists on new dot framework security.
The emergency medical care facility is reporting an epidemic outbreak.
The right vaccine apparently isn't available.
The tow company is asking about a large wooden horse on wheels in the parking lot.
One of the browsing shoppers claims she has been hijacked.
I await a ransom note.
Unidentified persons in groups are busily combing the mall conducting surveys.
"It'll just take a minute, we're trying to establish buying trends & offering shoppers free buttons to wear."
I guess the document's proposal, code-named Longhorn, must be considered now.
Makes me think that cattle used to eat the grass on this property.
A small-scale panic seems to be spreading through the main corridor at this moment.
Seems there was a worm sighting.
Worms used to crawl around among the rocks and dirt on this property.
The anti-virus Union is protesting favoritism and exclusive contractual-rights.
The window washers are working around the clock.
The clocks apparently need to be set atomically every other second for best performance.
Drivers of taxis are on strike awaiting an updated fleet.
Delivery drivers are saying the storage facility isn't. That it's an optical drive illusion instead.
My shortcut to the espresso bar is broken.
Was that in the EULA?
The lights momentarily flicker, and I'm alerted to the fact:
Control Panel is inaccessible.
I'm goin' walk across the street to the mini-mall over there.
I'm told there were similar problems, but they are all better now.
Happily I think things will get back to normal here at My Mall.
Looks like I need a refill, the coffee got cold.
I can do without the shortcut. I guess.
Blinkin' light tells me to go to the top of the building.
Yeah, thats right. Now I remember.
A smile replaces the about:blank facial expression I was wearing, thinking to myself...
That's why I watch Microsoft and follow directions carefully.
Edited by phawgg, 09 January 2005 - 10:10 PM.