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Paragrah Story


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#1 equinox55

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Posted 11 December 2005 - 09:40 PM

Paragraph


Wood burns in the hearth like wild horses running on upon open prairies; but the presents with there ranging sizes and delicate, colorful tied bows lie beneath the gleaming pine tree as they quietly wait for Christmas Eve. On the Christmas tree are bells swinging back and forth as they chime in tune to the crackling of the blazing fire. There are also candles brightly lit as if they where shimmering sunlight rays. They glance off the rich multicolored, crystal bulbs, but the star still shines above all even the glistening blazing fire that burns in the hearth. The red and green poinsettia garland crowns the glowing fire. Above the room is a shinning mirror that reflects a scene of Christmas anticipation.



Ok I had to do this for school and it needs commplet sentences and 2 figures of speech. It is disribbing this picture.
I has to be in anything other than frist person. It needs correct punctation too. Thanks for checking it. Any replays welcome you can tell me to add more too if you think it needs it.

Davis Baumung

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#2 equinox55

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Posted 11 December 2005 - 10:38 PM

updated post



Paragraph


Wood burns in the hearth like wild horses running upon open prairies, but the presents with their ranging sizes and delicate, colorful tied bows lie beneath the gleaming pine tree as they quietly wait for Christmas Eve. Pine scent fillís the room as the tiny bells on the Christmas tree swing gently back and forth as they chime in tune with the crackling of the blazing fire. There are also candles brightly lit as if they were shimmering sunlight rays. They glance off the rich multicolored, crystal bulbs, but the star still shines above all, even the cozy, glistening and blazing fire that burns in the hearth. The red and green poinsettia garland crowns the glowing fire. Above the room is a shining mirror that reflects a scene of Christmas anticipation.
Davis Baumung

#3 yano

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    I can see what you post!


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Posted 21 December 2005 - 03:43 PM

Um one thing the word "fill's" should be "fills" because you only use the 's when you using a noun, and 's is possesive.

According to MS Word, it says to add a , after the word "glistening."

But besides that great paragraph! and Very informative!




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