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You might be a geek if...


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#1 yano

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Posted 09 May 2005 - 05:55 PM

You might be a geek if...

-----http://billzhouse.com/fun/geek.html-----
1.) over half of your shirts have been supplied to you by vendors
2.) your first question about a new house is "how far is it from the CO?"
3.) someone says closet to you and you think of switches instead of coats!
4.) your idea of catching up with the news is reading SlashDot! Contributed by icognito
5.) you laugh because your parents still use a *modem*
6.) the worse possible punishment you can think of is using aol Contributed by icognito
7.) you get violently upset when your cable modem or dsl goes down!
8.) you are more upset about losing 20 minutes worth of coding than your wife wrecking the car
9.)you can't get off, without the glow of a monitor in your face... Contributed by Sangfroid
10.) you sit and make humor on irc... Contributed by Sangfroid
11.) you are using your secure i.d. token to choose your lottery numbers... Contributed by Sangfroid
12.) you find yourself trying to decode DTMF coming from the cellphone next to you on the train... Contributed by Sangfroid
13.) every license plate you see while driving is a unix command and you try to correct the syntax in your mind... Contributed by Sangfroid
14.) your idea of reading the comics is catching up on userfriendly... Contributed by icognito
15.) the pimples on your face, help you figure out a new network architecture... Contributed by Sangfroid
16.) windows and microsoft are swear words to you... Contributed by icognito
17.) you learned how to type before you learned how to swim
18.) you'd rather spend your Friday night playing around with Perl than partying with your friends
19.) if you prefer to write all numbers, including whole one, in their pure scientific notation format. Contributed by Shatter

-----http://www.geekstreet.com/ruageek.htm-----
20.) If you use old CD's as coasters.
21.) If you have spare computer parts cluterring up your house.
22.) If you use a pocket protector.
23.) If you use computer components as part of your interior decorating scheme.
24.) If you have a library without one of those yellow Dummy books.
25.) If you have used all tha available IRQ's on your system.
26.) If you think being called a geek is apositive thing.
27.) If you think that Saturday night is a good night for gaming.
28.) If you know who Tim Berners Lee is.
29.) If your slary is twice your age.
30.) If you'd rather go to a trade show than a strip show.
31.) If you spend more time troubleshooting than gaming.
32.) If you know why AOL sucks.
33.) If you have ahome network - and you live by yourself.

-----http://www.raiden.net/humor/geek.html-----
34.)If your computer costs more than your car.
35.) If you have more compuer than your car has gas mileage.
36.) You only have $50 and have a choice between the next hot game or food, so you pick the game and proceed to starve.
37.) You deicde that your cat makes a good dust rag for your monitor.
38.) You think that "The Sims" are real people.
39.) You tihnk Virtual reality IS the real world and real life is just some lame soap opera.
40.) You think Windows is a Virus. A very NASTY virus.
41.) You read the system recommendations on the side of your new game that say "install Microsoft Windows™ XP or better" so you install Freebsd.
42.) You think Linux is God and Microsoft is Satan.
43.) You think a modem is cruel and unusual punishment, a T3 is slightly better, an OC12 is nice and an OC192 is better than sex!
44.) You read Slashdot more than 10 times a day.
45.) You think a war is something waged online by gamers.
46.) You think AOL is Satan's evil brother.
47.) You think the DMCA is digital handcuffs.
48.) You think that Tech support is a fly strip for stupid people.
49.) You reinstall your OS once a month just for the heck of it.
50.) The opposite sex is beyond your understanding.
51.) Beer and Caffeine are your best friends.
52.) You worship Pitr as your evil Dredge Lord and read his book on becoming an evil genius.
53.) You love moding your computer and everything else you can get ahold of. Even your cat gets an upgrade.
54.) You recompile your Kernel daily.
55.) You've got so much hardware in your computer that you could fry eggs on the case cover.
56.) Your computer needs so many fans that it sounds like a jet prepping for takeoff.
57.) When you meet someone new online you ask them their Age, Sex, Location, and Uptime.
58.) The delivery boy knows you better than your own family.
59.) You avoid daylight at all costs and prefer darkness.
60.) You live on junkfood, caffeine, nicotine, and Anime.
61.) Your idea of camping out is a tent in the back yard, complete with wireless NOC.
62.) When someone asks you the last time you rebooted you reply "Reboot? What's that?" Or you can only remember which year it was.
63.) You think writing code is easier to understand than your own neighbor.
64.) Your idea of "the daily fix being a drag" is smoking a cigarette.
65.) You chuckle when someone makes a bad pun off "All your base are belong to us."
66.) If you're reading this right now.
67.) You have ever deferred to the advice of a message board for a medical, possibly life threatening issue.
68.) You're nocturnal.
69.) Using the term "w00t!" in casual conversation
70.) You think classic gaming consists of booting into dos and playing Wolfenstein 3D!
71.) You're a member of ClanBob!
72.) If your eyes hurt when you go outside during daylight or you have to wear welders goggles when under the direct sun.
73.) You are afraid you will vaporize in contact with sunlight. (aka vampire geek)
74.) If you frequently shout "My level 26 Mage whomps your level 24 fighter!!" or "Oh! Major ownage! Respawn! Respawn!"
75.) If you tend to think all arguments should be settled in a game of Unreal.
76.) If you have more than one messaging program open at a time.
77.) If you have ever messaged someone in the same room.
78.) If you can name every part in your system, including brand names of fans and power supplies.
79.) If you have ever managed to make a system spark/smoke/catch fire.
80.) You know all your friends by their internet Nic rather than their real name.
81.) You think that emotions consist of ascii characters.
82.) If you change parts in your computer more often than your own underwear.
83.) When your WinXP installation says the Code entered is invalid, you can look at it and immediately see what's wrong.
84.) You think that 2 Terrabytes of storage is good for starters. But way too small for what you need.
85.) You still think that there has to be a way to make your system take more than 4 Terabytes of ram.
86.) You can't figure out why cats like to eat pointing devices.
87.) You think that if it can't be found on the internet, then it must not exist!
88.) You'd consider an hour woefully inadequate to fully debate the merits of competing operating systems
89.) Every discussion about any topic concludes by paying homage to a now dead company's product such as your old Amiga or Voodoo2 card.
90.) The network administrator at work routinely asks you for input on fixing a problem, or asks you to build a system for him.
91.) You sit in front of a computer at work for 8 hours...then do the same when you get home.
92.) You can tell what the refresh rate of a monitor is just by looking at it.
93.) After you build your new computer, you immediately start to pick out parts for your next new computer.
94.) You haven't watched TV or used the phone since you got internet.
95.) You don't reply to anyone who has an e-mail address that ends in @aol.com.
96.) You know more serial numbers and product id numbers than phone numbers.
97.) You have an ICQ number that is less than 100,000.
98.) "REPOST" is considered a complete and correct English sentence.
99.) You brag about the size of your DVD collection, and even more about your downloaded shows collection.
100.) You've ever actually said "laugh out loud" after hearing a joke.
101.) Your post average per day online exceeds your age.
102.) Your soul deciding factor of where you go to college is how nice their RESNET is.
103.) A part of your computer dies and regardless of what it is, you have 2 more in your closet you can replace it with.
104.) You have 3 or more AIM names you use regularly, but you still insist AOL sucks.
105.) You walk into you local computer store and everyone shouts your name as if you were Norm from Cheers.
106.) You've ever considered, tried to, or succeeded at adding a freon cooling system to your computer.
107.) You're proud of the fact that you can beat anyone in Simpsons, Star Wars, Star Trek, Anime, etc. trivia.
108.) You spend more than half your paycheck on computer related items.
109.) You spend more time playing Everquest (or any mmorpg) than you do working, sleeping, and going to school combined.
110.) You go to more than one LAN party a week.
111.) It's 4 a.m., you haven't slept in more than 24 hours, you have a major project you have yet to finish due the next day, and you're posting on ATOT.
112.) Come Monday morning at work, you're quoting the latest synthetic benchmark instead of football scores to your coworkers.
113.) You know all your friends and family on a "primary nic" basis.
114.) You spend at least four times more money on computer related items than you do on food, clothing, home, auto, or other items.
115.) You could speak for more than 30 seconds about why a PC is better than a Mac.
116.) You spend more than 16 hours a day on your computer.
117.) When someone asks you for your address and phone number, you give them your email address and IP number.
118.)You are swarmed by the computer inept with gaggles of questions the moment one shred of your geekdom appears.
119.) Your friends and family treat you as their own personal "computer guy".
120.) You take tech support calls from friends and family at all hours of the day and night at your home.
121.) Everyone you run into wants to know what you recommend for their next computer or component purchase AFTER they've bought it, and then wonder why you didn't warn them.
122.) You know the cure for mass stupidity and greed is to wipe out Microsoft, AOL, and RIAA/MPAA.
123.) You obsess over Star Wars, Star Trek, Lord of the Rings, Stargate SG-1, or any other Sci-Fi out there.
124.) You still dream of owning a Light Saber.
125.) You want to own the Enterprise.
126.) You dream of Counselor Troy.
127.) You read lots of Porn and think it's the greatest gift to the world.
128.) You can still remember posting on BBS's back when your PC was a whopping fast 8mhz 286 with a 300 baud modem and an amber screen.
129.) You suffer terrible withdrawal when you can't be on your favorite MUD killing off bad guys and chumming around with Elves.
130.) You believe that sleep is optional, fragging is not.
131.) You think that dragons would make cool pets.
132.) You think Klingons are cool and own your own Bat'leth.
133.) You are waiting for the day when they develop a way to ingest coffee intravenously.
134.) You try to mod everything in sight. In fact, you are so successful, you even get Unreal Tournament to play on your wrist watch!
135.) You are fluent in at least 2 OSes and 3 programming languages.
136.) You can assemble a PC in 15 minutes in the dark with only a tiny flashlight after drinking a case of mountain dew and not sleeping for 48 hours and get it right the first time.
137.) You drink Jolt and MountainDew by the gallon.
138.) You type using every possible charecter or number other than a real letter! (example: 1|\/|1337)
139.) You remotely reconfigure and rebuild your kernel via ssh from 60 miles away!
140.) You have a /24 going to your house.
141.) You know what a /24 is.
142.) You name your first born child after a major coding language.
143.) Your Cat knows how to hack and your Dog has his own porn/warez distro.
144.) Your car has its own IP block.
145.) You overclock everything in sight, including your cat turning him into a 4 legged furball capable of Warp 3.
146.) You know the theme song and music to every single game you've ever played and can sing them by heart.
147.) You try to RMA you children because "they make these annoying sounds...."
148.) You know your phone number in binary and hexadecimal.
149.) You read the headline "Bush won't order ports reopened" and think they are talking about a firewall... "By order of the President of the United States of America, -A input -p boats -l -j reject."
150.) You have more anime and mangas than the local library has books.
151.) Coworkers bring their children to your office to play with your gadgets from thinkgeek.com
152.) You have so many CDs laying face up around your house you cant turn on a light without being blinded
153.) You laugh out load when newbies mispronounce Linux
154.) The Power consumption in your office at work is 4 times the normal amount
155.) You would rather get more dots per inch/frames per second than miles per gallon.
156.) You see something in your dreams and immediately start thinking of ways to mod it.
157.) You can freely debate the merits of PPP verses HDLC in your Cisco router configuration.

Enjoy... :thumbsup:

Edited by yanowhiz, 09 May 2005 - 06:12 PM.


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#2 frankie12

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Posted 09 May 2005 - 06:20 PM

very funny!!!

#3 yano

yano

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Posted 09 May 2005 - 06:28 PM

Yes. My favorite one is: You think a modem is cruel and unusual punishment, a T3 is slightly better, an OC12 is nice and an OC192 is better than sex!

just FYI:
T-1 - 1.544 megabits per second (24 DS0 lines)
T-3 - 43.232 megabits per second (28 T1s)
OC-3 - 155 megabits per second (100 T1s)
OC-12 - 622 megabits per second (4 OC3s)
OC-48 - 2.5 gigabits per seconds (4 OC12s)
OC-192 - 9.6 gigabits per second (4 OC48s)

#4 jgweed

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Posted 09 May 2005 - 09:36 PM

Great job!
Cheers,
John
Whereof one cannot speak, thereof one should be silent.

#5 yano

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Posted 09 May 2005 - 09:44 PM

Thanks I was watching Blue Collar TV on the TV (pun, lol) and was thinking about the book my grandfather had about the "you might be a redneck..." and decided hmm, surely some people had to done the "you mihgt be a geek..." :thumbsup:

#6 yano

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Posted 10 May 2005 - 01:49 PM

What's wrong with that? I wouldn't mind if google loaded faster... heck I wouldn't mind if everything loaded fast. :thumbsup:




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