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Need Help Monitoring Msn Messenger


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17 replies to this topic

#1 kit_tarry

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Posted 20 January 2008 - 05:56 PM

Hi, I am worried about the ammount af time and attention my friend's son is giving to his conversations on messenger.

I have looked around for some software to record his conversations (invisibly) and have tried a few free samples with very little success, as the samples don't give enough functionality and there are so many out there, that I cannot make a decent choice.

Can anybody help by recommending something that they know works, or any other help will be very much appreciated.

Edited by kit_tarry, 21 January 2008 - 05:48 PM.


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#2 Tomo2

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Posted 20 January 2008 - 06:32 PM

Well I found something MSN/Yahoo Message Archive Decoder and Viewer Doesn't keylog anything it just reads the logs that MSN makes of its conversations. Its good to be aware of whats going on in your PC not that I approve of reading other peoples stuff.

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#3 Monty007

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Posted 21 January 2008 - 02:52 AM

Hi, I am worried about the ammount af time and attention my son is giving to his conversations on messenger.

I have looked around for some software to record his conversations (invisibly) and have tried a few free samples with very little success, as the samples don't give enough functionality and there are so many out there, that I cannot make a decent choice.

Can anybody help by recommending something that they know works, or any other help will be very much appreciated.


Instead of spying on your son why not talk to him about it. The pros and cons and what can go wrong with internet chat rooms ect. If you suspect there is a problem there are better choices than spying. And what will you do if yo confront your son with certain things you have read.....you may loose his trust and that could be worse than what he is doing on MSN.

Sorry if I have offended anyone on this subjet but privacy is a subject I feel very strongly about, for reasons that I wont share on a forum.
MCP
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#4 Teenage.Zombiee

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Posted 21 January 2008 - 06:40 AM

I feel very strongly about this subject too.

Why not ask your son about what he does online and talks about on MSN?
Thats what my family do.

you may loose his trust and that could be worse than what he is doing on MSN


Monty007 is right.
I think your son has the right to talk about what he likes over messenger.. anyone has that right as long as its causing no harm :thumbsup:

Just try and find out why he likes about MSN so much. Im sure he can give you a simple and truthful answer :flowers:

Teenage.Zombiee is back ! :halloween:


#5 Dialer

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Posted 21 January 2008 - 02:12 PM

Having been stalked on line a couple of times, I also have strong feelings about the issue of privacy. But I have stronger feelings about parents' rights and obligation to ensure the safety of their children. There's a great deal of cybercrime against children and they sometimes need to be protected from themselves. My personal suggestion to kit_tarry would be to install whatever software you deem necessary to protect your son and to tell him that you have done so and why. Open discussion of such issues is always a good idea.

kit_tarry, here are links to some sites that you might find useful:

Parents - Information overview: http://www.wiredsafety.org/parent.html
Wiredsafety is a well-known site with an excellent reputation. There are many tips and links on that site, so be sure to click around.

IM and MSN and monitor software at TechRepublic: http://search.techrepublic.com.com/search/...nd+monitor.html

A U.S. Department of Justice site with many links: http://www.usdoj.gov/criminal/cybercrime/links1.htm

A compilation of links and tips: http://www.prevent-abuse-now.com/law3a.htm

Edited by Dialer, 21 January 2008 - 02:13 PM.


#6 Monty007

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Posted 21 January 2008 - 04:00 PM

Having been stalked on line a couple of times, I also have strong feelings about the issue of privacy. But I have stronger feelings about parents' rights and obligation to ensure the safety of their children. There's a great deal of cybercrime against children and they sometimes need to be protected from themselves. My personal suggestion to kit_tarry would be to install whatever software you deem necessary to protect your son and to tell him that you have done so and why. Open discussion of such issues is always a good idea.

kit_tarry, here are links to some sites that you might find useful:

Parents - Information overview: http://www.wiredsafety.org/parent.html
Wiredsafety is a well-known site with an excellent reputation. There are many tips and links on that site, so be sure to click around.

IM and MSN and monitor software at TechRepublic: http://search.techrepublic.com.com/search/...nd+monitor.html

A U.S. Department of Justice site with many links: http://www.usdoj.gov/criminal/cybercrime/links1.htm

A compilation of links and tips: http://www.prevent-abuse-now.com/law3a.htm


I do agree to a certain extent Dialer, I have a 14 year old that chats on MSN and what she says there is private to her but I have made it clear that her actions have consequence's and the danges this can bring.
Trust is a major issue, I just believe there are better options than spying on a loved one.
MCP
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#7 Dialer

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Posted 21 January 2008 - 04:20 PM

Trust is a major issue, I just believe there are better options than spying on a loved one.

True enough, Monty. That's why I suggested installing software and telling the boy about it.

Depending on the age and maturity of a child, trust isn't necessarily the issue at hand, IMO. Many children don't yet have the capability of knowing what's real and not real on the web. I see far too many stories on the news here in the U.S. about children who have run away or gone missing as a result of meeting up in person with someone they met on line.

Not sure if we're hijacking this thread by taking the conversation in this direction, although I do see it as being related to kit_tarry's saying "or any other help will be very much appreciated."

#8 kit_tarry

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Posted 21 January 2008 - 06:33 PM

Sorry to you all for my mistype on original post. I feel I should add that the lad is 19 years old, but mentally and emotionally about 12. His parents have finally felt that they could have their first holiday together since he was born and have left myself, his big sister and her boyfriend to keep an eye on him, while they are abroad.

Monty 007, Teenage.Zombiee, – In general I agree with you both, but we have spoken to him on many occasions about keeping safe on-line and he is open and forthcoming about all his friends except one.
We only know that his name is Petey and that he is encouraging the lad to join the church that he attends. Whenever asked about Petey or the church he get’s very defensive and on two occasions has become quite aggressive.

Dialer – Thanks for the links, and if you are hijacking this thread, then I thank you all. It is much nicer to have a balanced view.

Hopefully we are worrying over nothing.

#9 Dialer

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Posted 21 January 2008 - 07:29 PM

Thanks for filling in some of the background info, kit_tarry. It does seem as though this young man needs to be looked after on the internet, based on what you said. However, the fact that he has reached legal majority muddies the waters for me in terms of tracking his activities, unless there's some kind of medical diagnosis vis-a-vis his mental/emotional age.

Nonetheless, my instincts tell me that this Petey fellow is someone for you to try to learn more about. The fact that your charge is so forthcoming about all his online friends but this one seems disturbing. So please do check out some of those informational links I gave you, not just the ones with the software.

Best of luck to you!

#10 Teenage.Zombiee

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Posted 21 January 2008 - 08:59 PM

Sorry to you all for my mistype on original post. I feel I should add that the lad is 19 years old, but mentally and emotionally about 12. His parents have finally felt that they could have their first holiday together since he was born and have left myself, his big sister and her boyfriend to keep an eye on him, while they are abroad.

Monty 007, Teenage.Zombiee, – In general I agree with you both, but we have spoken to him on many occasions about keeping safe on-line and he is open and forthcoming about all his friends except one.
We only know that his name is Petey and that he is encouraging the lad to join the church that he attends. Whenever asked about Petey or the church he get's very defensive and on two occasions has become quite aggressive.

Dialer – Thanks for the links, and if you are hijacking this thread, then I thank you all. It is much nicer to have a balanced view.

Hopefully we are worrying over nothing.


Sorry if I sounded rude with my post (I tried to refrain from that by using smiley faces, but that usually makes me look like I'm being a smart a**)

:flowers: My goodness..
Maybe Petey just wants to share his religious views.. but I don't see the need for your friend's son to get defensive about it. Maybe he's taken some faith in these views and doesn't want you to know as he might feel you disapprove of that sort of thing (not saying you do)
This kid he talks to seems a bit odd. Well. Very odd.

By the way Dialer, I agree. This friend does seem disturbing. :thumbsup:

Teenage.Zombiee is back ! :halloween:


#11 Monty007

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Posted 21 January 2008 - 10:12 PM

This has been an interesting an open topic from members with different view points and help ideas, if there is anything else you need to know about safe surfing don't hesitate to post again Kit Tarry!
Dialer and Teenage.Zombiee have made som every good points and links, which is what it is all about.
Once the full picture comes to light more help and guidence is forth coming.
MCP
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#12 usasma

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Posted 22 January 2008 - 08:43 AM

A couple of years ago my wife and I had this same discussion about one of our boys. While we had the knowledge of how to monitor him, we talked long into the night about the morality of it.

After a lot of soul-searching we decided that we had to respect his privacy. We set limits on his behavior and checked on his adherence to those limits. And, being a kid, he challenged those limits - but he knew that we were checking (and what we were checking). In our case, I checked the router logs for the traffic that we had banned.

Surprisingly enough, he respected those limits with only one exception - and that was letting his brother on the system. We discussed this with him and showed him how to keep his brother off of his system - but he decided that it was more important to let his brother on than it was to adhere to our rules.

Since we don't want our network compromised, we cut off his Internet privileges (after numerous warnings) and he's been without the Internet for almost 2 months now. When he gets it back, it will be "with conditions" and we'll check up on him to ensure that he complies with our wishes.
My browser caused a flood of traffic, sio my IP address was banned. Hope to fix it soon. Will get back to posting as soon as Im able.

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#13 kit_tarry

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Posted 30 January 2008 - 01:29 AM

Cheers to all for your help and advice.

Thought I should bring this topic to a close and inform all who are interested of the "current" result.

After trying to talk to him and eventual removal of Internet connection, I managed to get a few, minor details from my friends lad.

Using what I had learned from him (and I'm afraid, a little eavesdropping) I discovered which church and when he was going to meet "Petey".

I am glad to say that he was suitably shocked to find that Petey was a misionary from the Church of Latter Day Saints and that he was in his early 30's.

Apparently my mate's lad was due to be baptised into the Mormon church and had been "advised" not to tell his family until after the event.

After speaking to an "Elder" and the lad I have managed to convince him that it would be best to postpone the baptism until after his parents return.

I must add that the missionary (Peter) has been spoen to by the "Elder(s)" and has appologised to the lad for misleading and pressuring as that is not the policy of the "LDS" and that the lad is still very much interested in joining.

All's well that ends well. (At least it ends in the hands of his parents)

Many, many thanks to you all. :thumbsup:

#14 Teenage.Zombiee

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Posted 30 January 2008 - 01:48 AM

Well, its good to hear it all worked out :flowers:

if you don't mind me saying though.. Thats some freaky stuff... :thumbsup: :trumpet:

Teenage.Zombiee is back ! :halloween:


#15 kit_tarry

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Posted 30 January 2008 - 06:04 PM

:thumbsup:

if you don't mind me saying though.. Thats some freaky stuff... :flowers: :trumpet:


you're telling me ....................

Ah well, at least it's only the Mormon's he wants to join.

It could've been much worse, but that'd be a whole new topic and I'm not starting one.

:) :cool: :inlove:




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