BleepingComputer.com: Keylogger

I know how you feel about keylogger programs and that it is a control issue; however, with teenagers and preteens, it is sometimes a matter of protecting them. What are your thoughts on this issue. I have grandchildren who are at my house 4-5 days a week and have found some of their online activities to be of concern. I have their password to the account that I know they use, but it's easy enough for them to have multiple identities and I think it is better to be able to monitor their online activities than to be constantly at their side when they are online. Besides, whatever they do on my computer, they will also be doing on their computer at home. It's not practical to keep them off the computer, because I think they need some experience on them to be successful in the future. But I want to be able to keep them from harm as well.

This post has been edited by viccy: 04 April 2007 - 04:34 PM

I've got 2 teenagers and came very, very close to putting keyloggers on their systems. But my convictions won out and I didn't do it. A keylogger isn't a substitute for parental supervision.

You can protect your kids without using a keylogger. It takes involvement and trust. Being involved can let you see things that a keylogger won't.

Do you tape record their phone calls? Do you follow them around listening to what they say to their friends? That's the equivalent of what a keylogger does. That's not protection - it's control.

It also sends a message to the kids that they don't have any privacy, nor any right to it. Without that, they can't develop a solid concept of "self". Face it, kids are going to hide things from adults. But the adults are more experienced, observant, and alert to these behaviors. Using a keylogger tells the kids it's OK to spy on them - so they'll think it's OK to use it themselves. Where does it end? Kids don't think that they need protecting - so it's the parents job to do it anyway despite their objections.

If you can't trust them, lock them in a closet until they turn 18.

Some things that I think are important:
1) Put the computer where you can see the screen whenever you want (not in their room with a closed door).
2) Put surfing protection on it.
3) Ask them what they're doing - that will let them know you're involved.
4) Limit computer use - and stick to it. Use passwords to control access.
5) Realize that the kids are going to try and find ways around your rules - be flexible and observant.

yes, know that, do all of that, but some kids need more restrictions and parents, or in our case, grandparents, need to have more information. I already know my granddaughter was using messenger for conversations with what appeared to be a sexual predator. Like you say, she thinks she is safe, I know better. Just FYI, I'm not new to this. I have 5 grown kids, one in high school and 15 grandchildren. There wasn't a problem with the others.

This post has been edited by viccy: 04 April 2007 - 09:22 PM

Hi viccy.

I realise that it is a little self-defeating, but as you are obviously concerned about her safety, you could have a straight talk with her explaining your concerns and that if she doesn't take more responsibility for herself then (no ifs buts or maybes) that is what you intend to do. Might just be the short sharp jolt she needs.

Good luck

Actually, we have had that conversation and I have told her the consequences would be a keylogger program so I could protect her.

If she continues to communicate with this person against your wishes - take the computer away.

My house was burgled several years ago - and I still remember the sense of violation that I had then. It's the same thing with a keylogger - you're violating them. AND it tells them that this is OK to do (because you're doing it).

Also, you found this problem without a keylogger - you can find it again without a keylogger.

If she's really determined, and you monitor everything - you'll just drive her elsewhere (where someone won't be looking after her).

Out of curiosity, how many children do you have, how many are girls, and how old are they?

I've got 2 of my own - a boy 29 and a girl 27
I've got 2 stepsons - 16 and 18

Please do whatever you like with regards to keyloggers - I will not be subject to your attempts to justify your actions (no malice intended here, I'm just not going to participate in this discussion anymore).

My apologies. I am sure you understand the frustration of trying to keep children safe, when they are convinced that nothing bad will ever happen to them. I am sorry if it seemed I was attacking you personally. That was not my intent.

I have talked to her on this issue until I am blue in the face, but she is very naive and convinced that she take everything on the web as being the truth

This post has been edited by viccy: 05 April 2007 - 09:08 AM

I have been following this threat with intrest. I have boys 13 and 17 and they are more or less responsible in their actions. I emphasise more or less.I still need to correct them in some ways.

The keylogger won't do on the long run. The first time you confrot her with that she will be off to an internet cafe or something similar ( like usasma said) and you are further from home.

There is basicly no sound advise to be given other than keep on talking. I have had various shades in my face..

The points which usasma made in his 1st post are the best you can do for the time being

Well, I'd certainly like to lock her in the closet until she is 18, but .......

viccy, on Apr 5 2007, 04:56 PM, said:

Well wouldn't we all.. Sometime you would like to stick them behind wallpaper and move to a far away country, at least I do..

THink we all have been or still are there.. I love them to death but so now and than...

You are so right. Especially when they keep repeating the same mistakes.

Hey Viccy

I'll bet you're pleased you asked a techie question about keyloggers and got a child rearing lesson!

I can understand where you're coming from. As a parent of two girls who are now 38 and 31 and who have grown to be absolutely great human beings, I know there are times when I overheard things perhaps I shouldn't have. I also know some of the things I overheard allowed me to set up "roadblocks" and "diversions" - all seemingly innocent, of course - so that a potentially dangerous situation could be better navigated.

Why did I do that? Because I wanted control. Why did I want control? Because at that time my children did not have the necessary life experience to navigate that particular fast running stream.

Drugs, boys and a particular group of ethnic predators were all problems that I was able to deal with reasonably successfully because I was alert and "listening".

I now have a couple of grand-daughters. If my children ask about keyloggers I will support them and their sensitive use of the information that keyloggers provide.

Oh yeah, I know that my response is a year after the event, but I had to vent.

Hope you found the answer to your simple question elsewhere without the sermonising or moral indignaton.

Jim