I scoped out the hill and realized that the new head honcho of the hill had become complacent after being in control of the hill for nearly an entire month without being challenged. I seized the opportunity and hired a blimp to drop a cell phone on the hill and then hired a professional 419 agent to make a tantalizing offer.
Good Evening, fine lady and master of the glorious hill. I'm calling to request your assistance in an important matter.MissPlaced:
Ok... how can I help you?419 Agent:
My cousin was a very wealthy controller of many hills in Abidjan before he passed away of oxygen deprivation. Those hills are quite high. In his will, he granted me control of all of his 17 hills, however, I'm afraid of heights so as you can surely understand I have a dilemma. I have searched high and low, hoping to find a suitable controller and master of these 17 hills. I had almost lost all hope until I spotted you majestically perched on the top of your glorious hill.MissPlaced:
Why thank you... who are you again?419 Agent:
I am a man desperately trying to find a hill master. Please, you must help me. The blimp dropped a map of the hills along with the passwords you will need to get past the guards.MissPlaced:
The blimp only dropped the phone, I don't see a map anywhere.419 Agent:
Oh... the wind must have blown the map off the hill. QUICK! You must find the map before it falls into the wrong hands. You must... before... do not...MissPlaced:
Hello? Hello?!419 Agent:
MissPlaced scans her surroundings and doesn't see anyone around. She quickly makes her way down the hill and searches for the map. After searching for a few minutes she finds a piece of paper that says:
Congratulations, you're the new owner of 17 fictitious hills in Abidjan. Is that even a real city? I received a random email from someone claiming to be the prince of this city. Anyway, while you're away on your adventure to find these nonexistent hills, I'll remain perched on top of this real one.
King Ted Striker
Controller of The Hill
P.S. I now have the hill.