10. Using Windows® helps develop your problem-solving skills as you chase down various and sundry glitches/errors
9. Using Windows® gives you a new appreciation for your 10 year old son/daughter (when you fail at #10)
8. Using Windows® with your children can help them understand why they should was their hands before eating, lest they too catch a "virus" (Susie can't come to school today, she's got a case of the Blaster Worm)
7. Using Windows® helps you keep your arsenal of expletives fresh and ready at a moments notice.
6. Windows® can help you at work too! If the document/spreadsheet/database you've been working on for 32 hours straight doesn't meet it's standards, Windows will conveiniently close the program and erase the file, destroying all evidence of your failure!
5. When you do your banking/shopping with Windows® Internet Explorer® 7, lots of interesting people will meet you. Or at least, they'll meet your credit card number.
4. Thanks to Windows Anti-piracy tools, you can rest assured that the schmuck down the street paid the same bloated, extortionate price that you had to swallow.
3. In fact, Windows® anti-priacy is so efficient, it will invalidate the copies of, and report to the FBI/Interpol people who even think about stealing it, or anything else, since the dawn of time!
2. With Windows® you no longer need to make errors! Windows does that for you!
and the number 1 reason why Windows® kicks the tar.gz out any other so-called "operating system";
C:\>erase *.* still works.