Most wifi routers can restrict access to certain MAC addresses. I use this, along with WEP to secure my wife's office wireless. While it's not the most effective, it stops most users from logging on. You can also review your router logs to see if there's unauthorized activity on your LAN.
Did the cable company work in your house - or just up to it? If they didn't work in your house, you might want to try splitting the cable where it comes into the house - with one side going straight to the modem and the other side to power the TV's, phone, etc.
Wireless throughput drops off the further you are from the router (or the more stuff that's in between the router and your PC).
But, it appears that the key thing here is that it occurs when your husband logs on. If this is the case, I'd first try having your husband setup another account on his system. Then have him logon with this new account and see if the behavior occurs. Have him step through each part of the logon process while you check the throughput.
If the throughput doesn't suffer with the new account - then it's a problem with the old account. If it does, then it's a problem with the common components/drivers/settings that the system uses. (BTW - he can safely delete the new account once he's done testing).
Here's a nice, free tool for tracking packets on a system (use it on your husband's and compare it with yours):
http://www.sysinternals.com/Utilities/TdiMon.html