Do you know why male elephants paint their privates yellow? So they can hide in grapefruit trees.
Do you know what season elephants hate? Grapefruit picking season.
Do you know how Tarzan died? Picking grapefruit.
Full Version: Elephant Jokes Revived
QUOTE
Do you know what season elephants hate? Grapefruit picking season.
Do you know how Tarzan died? Picking grapefruit.
LOL...betcha thats right.
Do you know how Tarzan died? Picking grapefruit.
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Elephants.
Elephants who?
Ella Fintzgerald!
It was a boring Sunday afternoon in the jungle so the Elephants decided to challenge the Ants to a game of soccer. The game was going well with the Elephants beating the Ants ten goals to nil, when the Ants gained posession.
The Ants' star player was dribbling the ball towards the Elephants' goal when the Elephants' left back came lumbering towards him. The elephant trod on the little ant, killing him instantly.
The referee stopped the game. "What the hell do you think you're doing? Do you call that sportsmanship, killing another player?"
The elephant replied, "Well, I didn't mean to kill him -- I was just trying to trip him up."
Why don't elephants ride bikes?
They don't have a thumb to ring the bell
Who's there?
Elephants.
Elephants who?
Ella Fintzgerald!
It was a boring Sunday afternoon in the jungle so the Elephants decided to challenge the Ants to a game of soccer. The game was going well with the Elephants beating the Ants ten goals to nil, when the Ants gained posession.
The Ants' star player was dribbling the ball towards the Elephants' goal when the Elephants' left back came lumbering towards him. The elephant trod on the little ant, killing him instantly.
The referee stopped the game. "What the hell do you think you're doing? Do you call that sportsmanship, killing another player?"
The elephant replied, "Well, I didn't mean to kill him -- I was just trying to trip him up."
Why don't elephants ride bikes?
They don't have a thumb to ring the bell
Ive got the 10 worst.
Elephant Jokes
1. What does Tarzan say when he sees a herd of elephants in the distance?
"Look, a herd of elephants in the distance"
2. What does Tarzan say when he sees a herd of elephants with sunglasses
in the distance?
Nothing. He doesn't recognize them.
3. What does Tarzan say when he sees a herd of giraffes in the distance?
"Haha! You fooled me once with those disguises, but not this time!"
4. What is the difference between en elephant and a plum?
An elephant is grey.
5. What does Jane say when she sees a herd of elephants in the distance?
"Look! A herd of plums in the distance" (Jane is colorblind)
6. How do you get four elephants into a Mini?
Two in the front, two in the back.
7. What game do four elephants in a mini play?
Squash
8. How do you get an elephant into the fridge?
1. Open door.
2. Insert elephant.
3. Close door.
How do you get a giraffe into the fridge?
1. Open door.
2. Remove elephant.
3. Insert giraffe.
4. Close door.
9. How do you know there are *two* elephants in your fridge?
The door won't close.
10. How do you know there are *three* elephants in your fridge?
There'll be one waiting outside in the Mini.
Elephant Jokes
1. What does Tarzan say when he sees a herd of elephants in the distance?
"Look, a herd of elephants in the distance"
2. What does Tarzan say when he sees a herd of elephants with sunglasses
in the distance?
Nothing. He doesn't recognize them.
3. What does Tarzan say when he sees a herd of giraffes in the distance?
"Haha! You fooled me once with those disguises, but not this time!"
4. What is the difference between en elephant and a plum?
An elephant is grey.
5. What does Jane say when she sees a herd of elephants in the distance?
"Look! A herd of plums in the distance" (Jane is colorblind)
6. How do you get four elephants into a Mini?
Two in the front, two in the back.
7. What game do four elephants in a mini play?
Squash
8. How do you get an elephant into the fridge?
1. Open door.
2. Insert elephant.
3. Close door.
How do you get a giraffe into the fridge?
1. Open door.
2. Remove elephant.
3. Insert giraffe.
4. Close door.
9. How do you know there are *two* elephants in your fridge?
The door won't close.
10. How do you know there are *three* elephants in your fridge?
There'll be one waiting outside in the Mini.
QUOTE
7. What game do four elephants in a mini play?
Squash
Squash
thats a winner!
And how can you tell if the elephants have been in your fridge??? Footprints in the butter
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How do elephants get up trees? (1/3)
How do elephants get down from trees? (2/3)
Why are crocodiles long, thin and flat? (3/3)
How do you fit four elephants into a Mini?
How do you know when an elephant is visiting your house?
What do elephants use as tampons?
Why do elephants have long trunks?
How do you get an elephant into a matchbox?
They sit on an acorn and fall asleep.
How do elephants get down from trees? (2/3)
They sit on a leaf and wait for Autumn.
Why are crocodiles long, thin and flat? (3/3)
They walk under trees in Autumn.
How do you fit four elephants into a Mini?
Two in the front, two in the back.
How do you know when an elephant is visiting your house?
There's a Mini outside with three elephants in it.
What do elephants use as tampons?
Sheep.
Why do elephants have long trunks?
Sheep don't have strings.
How do you get an elephant into a matchbox?
Take out all the matches first.
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